With Universal Studios Singapore opening yesterday, I started thinking about how game companies are missing out on a potential cash cow.

5. Marioland

Location: Tokyo, Japan (on the site previously occupied by Tokyo Disneyland)
Potential Attractions: Princess Peach’s Castle, Mario Karts
This Nintendo themed park, named after its mascot, has the most potential for reality. Nintendo simply needs to buy out Tokyo Disneyland and make a few modifications. The Enchanted Kingdom becomes The Mushroom Kingdom. Cinderella’s castle becomes Princess Peach’s castle. That ride with all those annoying singing kids, becomes that ride with all those annoying singing mushrooms.

4. Namco-Bandai’s World of Yesterday

Sorta like this...only not

Location: Tokyo, Japan
Potential Attractions: Pac-Man Maze, Galaga Simulator
In complete opposition to Disney’s Tomorrowland, an entire retro themed park, where everything is constructed from giant square blocks.

3. Rapture – 2K Resort World

Location: Somewhere in the middle of the Pacific Ocean
Potential Attractions: Deep Sea Diving, Vita-Chamber “Stimulation” Booth
2K games capture the resort world market with a 1 for 1 replica of utopian Rapture, located somewhere in between the US and Australia. Vacationing couples can stroll through the streets, soak in the atmosphere, and take a picture with a Big Daddy. ADAM protein shakes optional.

2. World of Blizzard

Not Currently Open

Location: California, USA
Potential Attractions: The Reaver Drop, Molten Core: The Ride, Karazhan Haunted House
Comprised of three distinct zones, the fantasy themed Warcraftland, the sci-fi themed Starcraftland and the “Opening At Some Point In The Future” Diabloland.

1. Valve Corporation’s Amusement and Recreation Centre

I approve this idea!

Location: Washington, USA
Potential Attractions: Half-Life Paintball Arena, Left 4 Dead Haunted House, Aperture Science Training Simulator, Gabe Newell’s House of Ribs
Mirrors, cleverly constructed identical rooms, actual rips in reality, I’m not sure how they would pull it off. All I know is, my deepest desire is to be antagonized by a singing computer.